What a Fungi!

Portobello and Goat Cheese Baguette
My favorite joke is the one about the mushroom that walks into a bar and sits down next to a beautiful woman. "Can I buy you a drink," he asks. With complete disdain and disgust, she says, "No way—you're a mushroom." His response: "But, I'm a fungi!" I've probably told that joke at least a million times and I still think it's laugh-out-loud funny.

Aside from my love of corny jokes, I have a thing for mushrooms. I love small, white button mushrooms thinly sliced with avocado and this crazy ginger dressing I whip up in the blender; I love brown cremini mushrooms finely chopped and added to soups and sauces and cooked down in butter. Of course, I really love those big, meaty portobello mushrooms, marinated and gilled. Mr. B likes it when I put them underneath big slabs of steak, and, when we're going vegetarian—though I never dare mention this to Mr. B beforehand—he enjoys them on chewy French baguette with juicy slices of tomato, basil leaves, a smear of olive tapenade, a few thin slices of red onion and the best part, a thick layer of goat cheese. The goat cheese and the mushroom make this sandwich a satisfying meal for just about anyone—Mr. B included.

What to serve with it? How about a side of mushroom jokes?

Portobello Mushroom and Goat Cheese Baguette

2 large portobello mushrooms, gently wiped, gills removed
1 clove of garlic, finely minced
1/4 cup of Worcestershire sauce
1 lemon, juiced
2 tablespoons of olive oil
salt and pepper

1/2 a loaf of French baguette, cut in two and then cut in half lengthwise
olive tapenade
fresh basil leaves
sliced tomatoes
thinly sliced red onions
semi-soft goat cheese log

1. Mix together minced garlic, Worcestershire sauce, lemon juice, olive oil and a pinch of salt and pepper; pour into a zip bag.
2. Add the mushrooms and turn to coat; remove the air from the bag and let the mushrooms marinate, at room temperature for 2-3 hours, turning bag over every 30 minutes.
3. Heat the grill and when hot, grill mushrooms until cooked.
4. Brush olive tapenade onto the cut sides of the bread and working from the bottom slice, layer red onions, basil, tomatoes, mushrooms, goat cheese and basil and top slice of bread; gently press.
5. Serve immediately, or wrap tightly in waxed paper and take on a picnic.


  1. Ha - love that joke! It sounds like a joke my husband would say.

    Still on the fence with mushrooms, although my daughter and I had a grilled marinated portabella mushroom at a farmers market last year and it was pretty good!


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